The Evangelist

I once met an Evangelist who said he could convince me of God's existence in just three hours with only rational arguments and a pair of electrodes.

Rene Cousteau

Rene Cousteau worked as a bank clerk. Everyday after work he would go to Victoria train station and hand beautiful women bunches of flowers.


There were tiny invisible strings attached to the bunches of flowers Rene Cousteau handed out. Rene Cousteau knew where each of his beautiful women were and could feel their pretty hearts beat. Very soon the tiny invisible strings crisscrossed London. In time they came to cover the entire world.

The Mystics

They wandered for days in the desert talking about their haircuts and wondering what the time was.

The Lovers

They sat in the library ripping out pieces of paper from their note books at each other. 


The sharp short tears were raw and passionate, the slow quiet tears were tender and affectionate. 


Nobody else knew.

St. John Chapter 18

Two large removal vans rolled through wooded countryside. They approached a garden in which sat Jesus Christ and a number of his disciples.
Out of the van jumped Alcohol Tobacco and Firearm (ATF) agents armed with assault rifles and wearing body armour. 
They advanced on the garden but disciples hidden in a wood fired on their flanks and a heavy machine gun, manned by St. Paul, opened up.
St. Peter threw a hand grenade which killed two ATF men.
In the chaos and confusion the ATF teams withdrew and the FBI were called in.


The whole thing was filmed live.


In the brief fire fight four ATF agents were killed and sixteen were wounded.


Jesus took a round in the shoulder but insisted it was just a flesh wound.