Sunday 26 May 2013

The Dali Lama


The Dali Lama often bursts into unrestrained laughter even amid the most serious of discussions. There is never any doubt however that he cares deeply about the topic since he considers each question at some length and confers with his translators and advisers before rolling around the floor guffawing. 

Saturday 18 May 2013

Sympathy


The tutor heard the story of lament and looked concerned. He opened a drawer of his desk, took out a sympathetic ear and offered it to the poor student who, wiping tears from her eyes, declined explaining that she had already eaten.

Saturday 11 May 2013

AK47


The wealthiest arms dealer in the world, who normally started three civil wars before breakfast, had a special bathtub made just for himself; it was solid gold and had the plug hole in the centre.

One sunday afternoon, as one hundred and three armed conflicts around the world were going on, the wealthiest arms dealer had a bath. Somehow while having his bath, the wealthiest arms dealer in the world managed to get his penis stuck in the plug hole.

'Bonk.'

The pressure from the water was so great that the wealthiest arms dealer was trapped in his golden bathtub.

Meanwhile two governments were overthrown and three new national anthems composed.

The wealthiest arms dealer in the world shouted and shouted for help but it was sunday afternoon and his servants all had the day off.

The wealthiest arms dealer in the world lay trapped in his golden bathtub for hours and hours.


The wealthiest arms dealer in the world only got out of his golden bathtub with the plug hole in the middle by drinking all the bath water and then pissing it out.

After that the wealthiest arms dealer in the world never sold another weapon in his life.


Monday 6 May 2013

Truism


The coiled spring lay in the corner of the room like a coiled spring.

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