The Astronauts

We made love and sounded like two astronauts on a space walk breathing softly into our microphones looking up at the bobbing world.

Coincidence

'Do you remember you asked me once if I thought anyone has ever had an original idea? Well yesterday someone asked me the exact same question.'

Barista

My wife and I took our two children to a coffee shop. 
My wife went to get our coffees and when she came back I asked her which one was mine. She pointed at my son Zak and said 'I'm pretty sure he is.'

Little God

When Little God created our Universe out of nothing, for no reason at all, at the back of his hyper-dimensional trailer park, without asking permission from an adult, his step dad was furious.

In front of Little God's cousins Little God's step dad asked Little God just who he thought he was.
Little God said nothing.

'You've set in motion the evolution of untold billions of conscious lifeforms for no reason at all. What were you thinking?'
Little God shrugged. 

'It's not funny and it's not clever' said Little God's step dad.

As punishment for creating our Universe Little God's step dad took all of Little God's toys away and ordered Little God to his infinitely sized room. 

'Just wait till your mom gets home!' Little God's step dad added as Little God headed to his room.

The Story

I've been living with this story. Night times are great but during the day it just sits around comparing itself to other stories I've had. It nags me to make it sing, to make it perfect. 
Anyway I've decided to finish with it.

The Appointment

I once phoned a psychic and invited her over to read my mind.
At the end of our slightly flirty conversation she asked for my address.
'But you're psychic' I reminded her and hung up.

Rain

One day all the hinges in my house came to life and flew away. 
The moment after they had gone all the doors in my house fell over one after the other like ponderous sentences. 

I wanted to write about this but it was raining.