Saturday, 31 August 2013

Cut and Curl

Miss Bagaboo's hair salon became all the rage among her old age customers due to her shimmering, strangely translucent hairdos. 

Sporting a Miss Bagaboo hairdo was soon de rigueur at the bingo on friday nights.

The old dears thought Miss Bagaboo's hairdos were the result of fancy hair products and wonder chemicals but Miss Bagaboo's hairdos were in fact the various appendages of a fifth dimensional being that dissected our three dimensional world at a number of points simultaneously. 

(What the old dears would have done had they known this is anyone's guess.)

Sunday, 25 August 2013

Saturday, 17 August 2013

Employee of the Month

Bernard A. Bell had worked at Shop-A-Lot for a number of years before he took up the company's offer of having his corpus callosum (the bundle of nerve fibres that connected his left and right brain hemispheres) severed - completely free of charge.

The day after the operation Bernard A. Bell wore a Shop-A-Lot cap to hide the stitch marks and was able to man two checkouts tills simultaneously thereby increasing his productivity significantly. 

The right hemisphere of the Bernard A. Bell's brain controlled his left arm that worked checkout till 4 and was more chatty with its customers while the left hemisphere controlled Bernard A. Bells right arm that worked the checkout till 5 and was much better at facial recognition and more musically inclined.

Three months after the operation Bernard A. Bell's left brain hemisphere was named employee of the month.

Sunday, 11 August 2013

The Ceremony

At an undisclosed date unidentified individuals will lay an indeterminate number of wreaths at the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier.

Sunday, 4 August 2013

Toy Guns

"Play nicely with those guns or I'll take them away" said the mother on the bus next to me to her children.

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